X-MORTIS DE LOS MUERTOS

Mood:  don't ask
What better activity could you possibly have planned for this Friday the 13th than heading over to Manray's X-Mortis for an evening of Morbid Mexicans, Latex Luchadores, Wicked Wrestlers, Sadistic Senoritas, Hellish Hombres...and just plain fun...

Featuring several body slamming, skull-shattering and downright dastardly tag team matches from the lovely but lethal masked luchadoras of La Gata Negra League of Masked Lady Wrestlers, "Danger is our Paycheck," including (of course!) our own lovely Ms. Renee?!?!?!?

The masked lady wrestlers will be doing 2 tag team matches for maximum mondo spectacle!!!!

Hope to see you there!

Manray | 21 Brookline Street |Cambridge, MA
Doors at 9:00 | $10, 19+ to enter ~ 21+ to drink
{when in doubt, wear black!}

MAKING THE CASE

Mood:  sharp
Now, my preference in the area of facial hair or lack thereof is not exactly a secret. Just ask the mister, who amazingly maintains his stony, obstinate, clean-shaven and dare I say, completely selfish, attitude in the face of my constant whining and cajoling. Many unenlightened and unimaginative (no offense!) people just do not understand my obsession. I will now illustrate, using two of the main characters of a gripping HBO series that I recently became hooked on, via DVD box set...Deadwood.
Yes, it's a Western, but the writing is extremely involving and intelligent...and do not forget: where there are cowboys and saloons, there are taches in spades.
Exhibit A: Seth Bullock. A man of integrity, honor, fairness...but with a big chip on
his shoulder and the ability to pound a man's head into a dirty saloon floor with nary an eyeblink.
It's all about the serious, intense gaze and clenched jaw.
Exhibit B: Tim Olyphant (the actor who plays Seth Bullock) without the tache! AIEEE!! Night and day! I mean, he's sort of attractive in that perfect teeth, modern-fashion, nicey-nice way I suppose, but uh....speaking entirely subjectively...er...apples and oranges...and definitely not my cuppa.

Next we look at my favorite character...the villainous Al Swearengen, played by Brit Ian McShane.
Exhibit C:Al Swearengen, owner of the Gem Saloon, master of all the dope, whiskey, whores, gambling, and just about everything else in town.
Words cannot convey the allure of the greasy hair, foul mouth tempered by liberal use of big words, striped suit, air of danger and power, one hand ready to pour a shot of whiskey, the other ready with a shattering fist to break a jaw. Ahhh. I am rather embarrased to admit to a big crush here.(ahem) Moving on...
But, take away the tache and...I give you a deflated
Exhibit D: Ian McShane, de-Swearengened . Noooo!! He looks like a benign game show host or somesuch! The tragedy! Look closer at his upper lip! You can almost see the sad aura of the missing tache!

It was nearly too much to bear to look at the tache-less images. I hope, however, that some of you have a greater understanding of the moustache mystique. If you cannot grasp it now, then there is little hope. Just doing my part....I may be a failure in my own home (I hope he reads this and feels guilty), but if I can convert but one, then my job is done.

It's quite a shame that I am not in college anymore, as I smell a thesis in these paragraphs...or, not.

PS: Yes, this was the double Tache o'the Week. Back to the usual well (un)loved formula next time!

COME SEE WISTERIAX!

If you are in the Boston area, do consider coming
to Skybar on Saturday night, May 7th, to see Karen perform her solo act, Wisteriax .
Our friends Amber Spyglass will also be playing. It will be a great evening, indeed!
-----------------
Wisteriax
Noah Maxner
Amber Spyglass
Cabiria

Skybar|518 Somerville Ave|Somerville,MA
21+Show|$6 Cover|Doors Open @ 7:30
-------------------

Karen had her wisdom teeth pulled just yesterday, poor thing, so do join me in sending her some positive thoughts!

AHHH....NOSTALGIA....

Mood:  surprised
So the other day I was driving somewhere and upon performing the usual musical selection blind grab, which consists of keeping one hand on the wheel and using the other to reach behind the seat into a bin of many, many old cassette tapes...*sounds of clattering plastic and the car horn of the person whose lane I veered into just a little*...I came across an unfamiliar tape. To solve the mystery, I popped it into the player and...was treated with an
amusing flashback. It was a tape I made on a rickety old recorder of one of Karen's and my first Sob Sisters practices, over two years ago! I had to smile as I listened, as it took me right back. Let me just make the understatement that we have come so
far! A parakeet-ial domestic dispute can be heard in the background throughout, and the tempos were much slower than they came to be. And, we were without the magic that is Miss Heels, too. It is a great thing, in all areas of life, to stop and take notice of where you've been and how far you've come, don't you think? I can't wait to play it for the girls next time we meet! And then lock it away in a reinforced safe, guarded by a small troll, deep in the earth, so that no one will ever find it! This photo was taken about that time as well...sitting on my living room couch. Egads! We were so much more serious then.
Seems like so long ago, and yesterday...all at the same time.

Here's a picture from after the event Saturday night at MassArt, where I did not, thankfully, end my cello " " 'career' " " with an injury...though I'm thinking the league should hire a staff masseuse.
Here we are standing in front of the work of Mr. Reusch, probably, if I recall, making observations about a young college boy with a semblance of a handlebar who had wandered into the room moments before.

We're terrible...

IT'S THE 100TH POST!

Mood:  celebratory
Wow.
100 times now that I have spewed nonsense right here for everyone's amusement...or non-amusement,
in many instances, perhaps...fickle public...psh.
Time flies so quickly anymore. Though, deduct a baker's dozen or so for being the work of Karen (those would be the more coherent and constructive ones, if you're checking), and then it's not quite so bad.

Spring has finally sprung around these parts...nothing quite matches a New England spring, except a New England autumn, of course.
I can't stop sticking my nose in the pansies every time I pass through my patio...though the bees are starting to appear as well, so I'd better be careful or I'll end up with an internasal surprise.
As for more relevant items, we are continuing to polish up our repertoire, alone and with Mr. Robertson, for upcoming events. May 20th (a Friday night, so no excuses!) marks Ukulele Noir IV (just had a flash in my head of being greyhaired and arthritic, telling people to come on out to Ukulele Noir XXVII...). After that, there is a trip down to Baltimore to perform with Mr. Robertson at MAUI (Mid-Atlantic Ukulele Invitational)in June, which should be a blast...and a pocketbook depleter, since I hear there are scads of vintage ukes for sale usually! Uh oh! Once you get one, there's no stopping. Just ask Craig and Karen about that!
On our own, there are some upcoming things later in the summer at the Nave Gallery, and at Skybar...where we will be on a bill with the rather enchanting Tuna Helpers, who are coming all the way from Texas!
Details can be seen on the Concerts page.

In the meantime, if you need something to do this weekend, do come out to this on Saturday night:
Burly-Q, Wrasslin', and Sundry Hubbub at Mass Art!
You'll see the glorious art of our friend Mr. Reusch, a few great bands, some saucy shenanigans by our friends Black Cat Burlesque , aaaaand, you can gasp and bite your fingers while you watch with horrified suspense to see if, indeed, I will injure myself in a way that will end my cello "career" forever, right then and there, with a badly executed Sunset Flip...as part of La Gata Negra ! Oh, the thrills!! All this is being put on by the formidable Black Ocean and Eventworks. Come on out! Or...stay home and listen to it rain outside, then. Hmph.

One last thing...
But it's only for Mr. Hill, Mr. Russo, and Mr. Savile as they are the only ones who expressed any concern at the prospect of losing their weekly tache fix. So, gentlemen (the rest of you...don't you have some work to do or something?? Shoo! NO taches for the ungrateful...turn away now..) I present to you a very militarily dignified, formal, intense-looking, and VERY dishy Tache o'the Week! It's The Hill-Russo-Savile (or Savile-Russo-Hill...you guys can work that out...pistols or swords?) Memorial
Tache o'the Week! Behold the majesty! *cue "Reveille"*

I think I must go and find something to do now...nip these odd stray thoughts about being a nurse in WWI in the bud...ah, yes..the garden needs water...or something...."Nurse!"...er...what was I doing? Oh, yes...the garden...uh...

GRUMPY TACHE

Mood:  irritated
Well, only because I promised...and because I wouldn't want anyone to get in a hot bath and slash their wrists because they had to go tacheless for over a week. My conscience would never forgive me.
So here he is, the disgruntled-looking Tache o'the Week.

He looks rather representative of how I feel today.
No reason, just...blegh.
Perhaps, though, he had a reason.
Perhaps a burglar broke into his medicine cabinet and made off with his wax. Perhaps things were not going well down at the stock market. Or, perhaps he somehow knew that someday, many decades from that moment, his image would be appropriated by a strange girl and paraded around the ether for all to see. Perhaps, like me, he just needed some caffeine. Or...maybe, just maybe...he, too, never got any comments on his blog unless he groveled.
I bet that was the problem right there.
I feel his pain.

In other news, it seems that being surrounded by the dimunitive charm of so many ukuleles has rubbed off on me as well. I had one before (which I seldom touched) but recently got another, better one from Mr. Robertson. Karen has already been indoctrinated into the cult, as anyone who has seen her masterful strumming at our most recent shows can attest to, and it looks like I am next to be affected by the virus. Formal lessons start soon. They are just so darned irresistable! So portable. So cute. So easy-going. Though not exactly easy. I find the challenge of having to pretzel my fingers into crazy configurations and think about chords rather frustrating. It's enough sometimes to make me run for the familiar embrace of the cello...and a nice, melodic, chord-free classical piece. But, one must persevere to progress, no?

DREAMCHILD LIVE

Mood:  chatty
So Sunday evening last marked the CD release party of our good friends, Dreamchild,
at the Middle East Upstairs. What an enchanting evening!
First up was an ambient noise trio, consisting of Mr.s Kris Thompson and Rob Byrd, plus our own Miss Karen! Looking lovely in black and purple, she did all sorts of crazy things to Tallulah with a pile of electronic gadgets and gizmos at her feet, and occasionally a mallet, small music box or thumb piano in hand.

The end result is a very dreamy, drifty soundscape that nearly hypnotizes. This is the sort of thing she does as Wisteriax, and it's quite fascinating.
She also played more melodically with Annette Farrington for a great set.
Next up was Dreamchild, who gripped the audience with their singular brand of dark, etheral loveliness, chilling storytelling about severed heads and floating lyres, and vocals that make the hairs on the back of one's neck stand up. (In a good way!) Here's Cheryl at the helm of her harp...

Unfortunately, we did not get to stay and enjoy the last act, Ultraplush , as it was quite late and we are not spring chickens anymore.
In fact, Miss Heels and I were rather sticks-in-the-mud, really.
A couple of teetotallers...how uninteresting!

Miss Heels has been under the weather, and I learned long ago that in the course of a given evening, sometimes one must choose between corset or drinking.
Yes, an enjoyable (and very clearly remembered!)
evening all around.

Congratulations to Dreamchild on their new release, and boy, is that Karen a model of versatility!

FLORAL TACHE

Mood:  crushed out
Ahhh...I found a great one for this week!
The only problem is that I don't understand a lick of German, so I have no idea what the message is.
If anyone of you reading this could translate, I'd be much obliged! (See, below, there's this thing called "Comments" and if you click on it, you can send a message. Pretty simple! Fun! Easy! New and Improved! Banter With a Sob Sister! Amaze Your Friends! Or...don't, then.)
I'm just hoping it says something like, "Dearheart,
you are my one and only beloved." or perhaps "I would gladly skewer my eyes with toothpicks like martini olives at your behest." and not "Condolences and flowers on the occasion of your tragic death." Someone solve the mystery. Here he is, the swoontastic Tache o'the Week!

Imagine, if you will, opening the front door to find this scene on a Saturday afternoon...complete with the scents of stargazer lillies and Bay Rhum aftershave mingling in your nostrils and perhaps a picnic basket crammed full of port and Roquefort waiting on the doorstep, blue skies above and cheerful birdsong in the air. Fine, don't then...but allow me. *sigh* Spring fever hallucinations...do forgive.
(I really should acquire another, more constructive hobby. Some sort of needlework, perhaps...)

In "serious" news, if you are in the Boston area, do come out to the Middle East Upstairs for the CD release party/show of our good friends Dreamchild this Sunday evening at Middle East Upstairs in Cambridge, MA. Also participating in the lineup that evening is our own Miss Karen, who will be lending her strings to Annette Farrington and also Rob Byrd&Kris Thompson. She's one busy bee! I'll be there, camera in hand, and I'll be sure to share a snap or two here.
Dreamchild's lovely, darkly ethereal music will give you the chills...and their new album is a marvelous thing, indeed.

Also, coming up for us next Tuesday is Ukulele Noir III . These are beginning to become as monumental as world wars.
Ok, well, not really. But it's a grand old time, nevertheless. Do come say hello!

A NIGHT AT THE NAVE

Mood:  celebratory
So last night we had a wonderful set at the Nave with Mr. Craig Robertson and his spiffy spectator shoes, and it was a blast! Well, the bits I can remember considering my worried, accidental cough syrup overdose beforehand...but hey, I made it through without one little cough, so...mission accomplished. (Even if I did begin to forget what the mission was.)
It was also one of the first times that Karen busted out the vocals, and she sounded lovely, naturally, uke in hand. Miss Heels enraptured the audience, as usual, with her wailing, warbling saw...and we saw the debut of her new parlor trick: recorder playing! Who knew?
Matt Samolis of Lindi's Radio, and Mike the bassist started off with a wonderful, parsnip-laden set of old-timey tunes. Then my mister, Lucien Desar, took the stage for some stirring, cabaret-style piano and vocals...and if anyone reading this saw him, tell me something: wouldn't he look even more smashing with a handlebar?? A true shame, but I digress...
Finally us Sisters took the stage, launching into a snappy "I'm Looking Over a Four Leaf Clover" before Craig and his uke joined us for a great set.
They seemed to have liked us...and a good-sized crowd at that!
Our next performance will be at Ukulele Noir III, March 29th. See Concerts page for details.
Til then, here's a photo from last night

My advice: take it easy with the Vicks Formula 44D if ever you are obligated to do any activity which requires some amount of focus.
And measure...don't swig!

SPRING FEVER

Mood:  sharp
Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but here in New Antarctica..uh, I mean, New England...we are just dying for some sunshine and warmth. The end of winter is just about unbearable, and rather than succumb to complete catatonia in a straightjacket, I often force myself to keep busy by making pretty things. Now, compared to Karen, who is about the craftiest person you'll ever meet, I'm rather minor league. But even I was able to successfully follow her instructions on making knee garters! Find them here: garter instructions.
Here's how mine turned out:

These are great, as they are quick to make with a sewing machine...and the combinations are endless!
Various colors of ribbons, patterns of lace, and decorations can be used. I used black lace over sage green ribbon, and I found these cute flapper buttons at my local fabric shop...though it was hard to choose between those and some nifty Art Deco-style silver ones...or pretty ribbon roses.
But since it's such a speedy and inexpensive project, why not make several pairs?

Luckily for you vast scores of faithful (and painfully non-commenting) readers, it's also time for the Tache o'the Week. This one has not only a wonderful configuration with endearing, tightly spiraled ends, but also such an expression of boyish sweetness. No cad here!

I bet he'd pick me...er, I mean...uh...a girl...an armful of daisies, and do all the rowing on a breezy spring afternoon down a meandering river, all while perhaps whistling vaudeville tunes. *sigh*
Imagine. Or, just excuse me while I do.

Do, if you are able, come on over to the Nave Gallery this Saturday, where we will be doing a good-sized set with Craig Robertson. It's FREE, too!
All details can be seen HERE!
It should be wonderful, though for my part, I need get over this nagging cold thing by then! Yes, Winter needs to just pack its bags and get on out...and not let the door hit it in the...